Here is a primer for those of you who still don't understand how global warming works:
- The dinosaurs came, but they got too big and fat, so they all died and they turned into oil.
- We drilled for oil, and used most of it to spray on ducks, and the rest we turned into carbon dioxide.
- Carbon dioxide is a hot gas, and it's making the Sun hotter, which is making the Earth hotter, which makes polar bears sweat, and that's a bad thing.
- To make the Earth cooler and make polar bears happy, Canadians will pay money to Stephane Dion, who will give all of it back.
- The exchange of money will cool the Earth (ok, this part is a bit vague).
- Farmers are worried that they won't get enough back after all of it is given back (clearly they are confused, because everyone is supposed to get all their money back, a process that results in global cooling in a way that is not entirely understood by non-Liberals).
- Liberals who are worried that farmers won't vote for them are complaining loudly, which is generating even more hot air (which warms the Sun and makes polar bears sweat even more, and that's a bad thing).
- Stephane Dion is going to change the plan by making the carbon tax even stronger, making farmers happy so that they stop bothering Liberals.
- This results in less hot air and comfortable polar bears.
- The happiness of farmers who might vote Liberal will cool the Earth (ok, this part is a bit vague too).
Remember, if you don't believe this science, David Suzuki is going to throw you in jail.
But perhaps you want know more details, minus the silliness.
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