In Defence Of Absentee Black Fathers

Saturday, March 22, 2008

System unfair to black fathers

Leonard Pitts Jr.'s recent column "Children bear the burden when fathers walk out" excoriates "selfish" African American fathers who "abandon their children [and] harden themselves against their cries of need." Pitts cites Larry Patterson, Jr., a 19-year-old black father who, after police tried to pull him over, allegedly sped away, smashed his car, and escaped, leaving his infant daughter in the backseat. Patterson is "unique only in degree," Pitts writes-for black men today, it's "Every man for himself."

Pitts' generalization is unfair. He is correct that some African-American fathers have behaved irresponsibly. However, he fails to see that many black fathers have been driven away by shortsighted, angry mothers and a family law system which does little to protect fathers' loving bonds with their children. When citing the reasons for father absence, Pitts mentions "divorce" only in passing. Yet divorce and the breakups of unmarried couples are major causes of African-American fatherlessness.

Despite the stereotype of the feckless and irresponsible male, research shows that the vast majority of divorces are initiated by women, not by men. Even for unmarried couples, it's doubtful that many dads wake up in the morning and say to themselves, "My child loves me and needs me, my girlfriend loves me and needs me-I'm outta here." Yes, some mothers have good reasons for these breakups. Yet, as Jonetta Rose Barras, the African-American author of Whatever Happened to Daddy's Little Girl, explains, many black fathers are simply being "kicked to the curb."

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