...they have been screwing everyone regardless of sex, age, religious affiliation, party affiliation, etc.
Pride in our mayor
City Hall closet could pop open
Are we ready for a gay mayor?
Are you ready for a gay mayor?
There's a choice of two answers.
One: It makes no difference. Any more than if the mayor is Catholic, tall, baritone, a Leo or a one-armed blond named Lefty.
Two: No way, Jose. Next thing you know, he'll redecorate City Hall. Council meetings will open with a show tune. Then they'll all go shopping. Every day will be Gay Pride Day. The "public purse" will take on new meaning.
While you're deciding which answer is yours, let's look at what others are saying now that George Smitherman is in the running.
"Mr. Smitherman will be like every other candidate -- he'll have to explain his perogatives and his vision," sayeth King David, as he prepares to abdicate.
Like every other candidate? Not exactly. He's the only bald one.
"The reality is he's just another downtown person who's vying to be mayor," opines west-end contender Councillor George Mammoliti.
Downtown person? Not that there's anything wrong with that.
So far, no one has jumped up to say it would be grrrreat to have a gay mayor.
Well, would it?
You saw the photo in yesterday's paper of Smitherman embracing his husband Christopher at the campaign launch.
You okay with that? Not blowing a blood vessel or breaking out in hives?
This was going to happen here sooner or later, you know.
Closets are popping open all over.
Even in France, land of l'amour. Paris' gay mayor, Bertrand Delanoe, is considered presidential material.
"Ich bin schwul, und das ist auch gut so," said Berlin mayor Klau Wowereit. "I am gay, and that's a good thing." He is considered chancellor material.
My, my, if those two had run Germany and France, maybe we'd have been spared two world wars. Gays, of course, are notoriously mild-mannered.
As I write this, my life coach, Robin H-C, happens to call. She thinks Smitherman will do well with the female vote. "Women like gay men. They're more expressive and easier to connect with, and to trust. I know they won't try to manipulate the relationship into them getting laid."
This does not mean gay mayors are scandal free.
Take Sam Adams, the first openly gay mayor of a big American city, Portland, Oregon.
Earlier this year, hizzoner admitted lying about an affair with a teen intern (not another one!) named Beau Breedlove (I kid you not.)
Political sex scandal is an equal opportunity employer.
Adams has since dated the artistic director of a ballet company (aha!) and a reporter (what?!)
Aren't stereotypes fun?
Okay, artsy-fartsy strongholds like Portland and Paris are one thing. Cities in the Great White North, home to hockey, lumberjacks and beaver-trappers, are another.
Such as Winnipeg. There are few more macho places on Earth.
Yet Winterpeg elected the continent's first openly gay major-city mayor, Glen Murray, in 1998.
The rustics huddled around campfires at Portage and Main soon stopped making jokes about the Assiniboine and worrying the Red River would turn pink -- Mayor Murray cut property taxes AND reduced the city's debt.
Name sound familiar? Murray now lives in downtown Toronto -- and is considering a run for mayor.
Holy smokes, we'll have two gay candidates to choose from. What a tolerant and forward-thinking populace we are.
Or are we? This multicultopolis has one black city councillor and three Asians, out of 44. Sandra Bussin is from Mars, but that doesn't count.
As far as I know, we have but one gay councillor, Kyle Rae. That's out of whack, though, frankly, the thought of two Kyle Raes makes me woozy.
So a gay mayor is a big deal, no matter how everyone soft-shoes around the idea.
Are we ready for one?
I hope so.
The question should be: Are we ready for George Smitherman?
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