I Promise McGinty Getting Ready To Go To The People

How many promises did the fiberals make and how many did they actually keep? They certainly kept the one about taxpayers not having to pay more taxes and the health premium and giving the leftists at city hall additional powers, including imposing new fees, are not taxes.

January 2, 2007
Dalton’s winning strategy
It’s never too early to road test campaign slogans for the upcoming Ontario election
By LORRIE GOLDSTEIN

Happy New Year, fellow Liberals, and welcome to the first of what we hope will be many productive strategy sessions leading up the re-election of Dalton McGuinty as Ontario premier on October 4. (Scattered applause.)

As you know, we’re facing a fixed election date for the first time in our history, so it’s important to establish our main campaign themes now.

We want to define Premier McGuinty in the minds of voters before anyone in the opposition parties has a chance to do it.

To that end, I and a small group of the premier’s top strategists have been brainstorming some possible re-election slogans we want to try out on you today.

So, please, give us your honest opinions. Ready? Here we go

First: How about, “Premier McGuinty, he did what he said he would do”?

So, what do you think folks? Short? Snappy? To the point?

Yes, you … you with your hand up in the back row … please stand up and tell us what you think.

Okay … you’re going to have to stop laughing, or the rest of us aren’t going to be able to understand you.

Try taking a few deep breaths and thinking of something really sad — like Dwight Duncan’s reaction when he found out he was going to be energy minister … again.

Okay, I’m sorry, but I still can’t understand a word you’re saying. You’re still laughing too hard.

Anyone else? Anyone for “Premier McGuinty, he did what he said he would do?” No? All right, let’s move on to our next slogan.

It’s “Premier McGuinty, spending your tax dollars as if they were his own.”

Okay, now that’s enough laughter from you folks at the back of the room.

Yes, you, you and you … you know who you are.

What was that? How can we possibly suggest Premier McGuinty spends your tax dollars as if they were his own when he just raised his own salary and that of all MPPs by 25%, right after saying he wouldn’t?

Easy. If you could spend your tax dollars as if they were your own, wouldn’t you give yourself an immediate 25% raise?

Of course you would! Case closed. This just shows Premier McGuinty is a regular guy. A regular guy struggling to get by on $200,000 a year,just like the rest of us.

Now, for our third suggested slogan: “Premier McGuinty, taking the high road towards a better Ontario.”

What’s that? You’re saying he didn’t take much of a high road in the Parkdale-High Park byelection where we portrayed Cheri DiNovo, the NDP candidate and a United Church minister, as Satan’s daughter, twisted quotes from her sermons absurdly out of context and pretended her old admissions about once being a street kid were a huge new scandal?

Yeah, we did all that, but what’s your point? After all, we won that byelection, didn’t we?

What? We lost Parkdale-High Park to the NDP? Geez. I was sure we won.

Okay, what idiots did we put in charge of countingthe votes in Parkdale-High Park, because I distinctly remember somebody telling me we’d won. Somebody who obviously can’t count worth a damn.

What’s that? We put the Hydro One board of directors in charge of counting the votes in Parkdale-High Park? Oh. Okay. That explains a lot.

What’s that? Your suggested slogan for the election campaign is, “Premier McGuinty, still not as rich as John Tory?”

Well, that’s an interesting idea, particularly since Tory and the Conservatives did support us on that 25% pay raise.

Hmmm. “Premier McGuinty, still not as rich as John Tory”.

Yep, that’s a keeper. Write it down, boys.