Most people will look to one event as the story of the year. I look to many events – too many, in fact – that, when combined, become one single, unhappy story. The most recent is the tragic, senseless death of Aqsa Parvez. Add to her slaying those of the 10 women killed by partners in Toronto and the many more abused and killed in Canada, and you'll see that violence against women stands out as the most newsworthy event of 2007.
It is a story of note because the situation never seems to improve. Some 100,000 women and children seek safety in a shelter every year. Too many women continue to die at the hands of their partners.
Before we can begin solving this problem, we must be honest about its source. Abuse does not occur because a man is under stress or because he was provoked by his partner's behaviour – excuses given far too often in these cases. The real reason is misogyny. Overcoming prejudice is difficult, especially when it results in violence that few people see and that outsiders cannot always prevent. In the case of misogyny and its physical and emotional impacts, the problem is compounded by the cycle of violence.
We can teach children that violence is unacceptable, but when they are faced with it in their own homes, the lesson will have little impact and the cycle will continue.
If we cannot eliminate the prejudice, we can at least take steps to mitigate its effects. What we need most is a public discussion about the pervasiveness of the problem. Sensational cases like that of Aqsa Parvez or the Pickton trial garner some attention, but rarely does anyone in the media make the connection between the "big story" and the everyday abuse that so many women endure.
If we speak out, perhaps we can make more women aware of the community supports that exist. Media, politicians and community leaders can highlight the work of places like sexual assault centres, women's centres and distress lines. If we can create a groundswell of public opinion against these crimes and let women know that there are people out there who can help, maybe more women will have the confidence to leave.
And maybe, just maybe, the subject of next year's story of the year will be survival, not murder.
Crystal Smith, Oakville
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