I Know What a Gangbang is. What's a Clusterfuck?
by Betty Lee Mason
When I was in college at Berkeley in the 50s, my sorority sisters and I used to go to gangbangs all the time. Fraternities and sororities would get together for organized, social gangbangs. We'd meet each other and then we'd gangbang. That was what we did back then. Lots of gangbangs.
But today, I keep hearing the word clusterfuck. What is a clusterfuck? It sounds like a gangbang while playing a game of Twister. It sounds painful. With young people today, everything has to be more extreme than whatever their parents did. Each generation topping the previous.
You may think I'm an old-timer, but I used to take it in the ass until my husband's massive, wrinkled cock broke the lining of my colon. I was 62 at the time and I was shitting blood for a week. My advice: No anal sex over the age of 60. And if there's colon cancer involved, you can forget about it. They should teach that in sex ed classes today, but of course they don't. So, obviously, I'm not some kind of old prude.
But today things are just getting too extreme. The Internet used to have a site called amateurfaceshitters.com. I think it’s still out there. Maybe the recipients of the repeated face shits revolted, demanding professional faceshitting status, with decent wages, benefits and flex time. Maybe they created a union, with branch names like Faceshitters Local 451.
I haven’t checked, but they could have changed the name to www.professionalfaceshitters.com. That would make sense, since the faceshitters should have plenty of faceshitting skills and experience by now...unless it's some kind of amateur faceshitter factory, with new faces coming in every day and shit-stained faces getting thrown on the curb, with no severance pay, pention or benefits and only the hopes that some employer somewhere will accept their shit-stained faces. That's probably what's going on. By the time you're worthy of professional faceshitting status, your face is so stained that nobody wants to videotape you. They definitely need a union.
In my day, nobody was shitting on anyone’s face. That’s extreme. And apparently these people weren’t even getting paid, if they really were creamy-skinned faceshitting amateurs. That means the women on the site thought to themselves, “Okay, I’m going to let this guy film me while another guy takes a dump on my face. And I’ll do it free.”
Hey, I got my platinum-tipped vibrator, a jar of Miracle Whip and four seasons of Matlock on DVD. So all these young people today, well, they can all just go shit on each other's faces and clusterfuck themselves.
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